Why do we feel sad, if someone questions us? Even if the question is valid.. still it hurts.. is it the ego or insecurity of letting others know our shortcomings. All of us work in this world with a mask. Yes, Freud was right. How irritated I become if someone says you didn’t do well. .. I feel am being intruded upon. But all these questions are useless as I already know about my lacking and these questions have been lingering in my brain. Then why X or Z has to come and question me?
All of us try to put a mask for the outside world, mine is simple yet happy. To the outside world, all is so rosy, a young woman who achieved whatever she asked for. Studying at the best institute, marrying the guy I liked, moving to the city I liked, marrying into a nuclear family, working for the companies which gave me satisfaction of work, moving to the unknown, unexplored world that too with my family and getting a lovely daughter. If you asked me 10 years back, this was IT! This is what I had ever dreamed of. Then why am I sad today? Just because of one question? The question which forces me to keep my mask aside and answer. This one asks me to answer to the face, which portrays me as not a good person, may be for a second but am not happy. But how can everyone be good to everyone? Happy to everyone? You can’t appease all, and in this selfish world, “I” rule. I have to be happy first, I have to be satisfied first.
Such a revelation, so with the mask of making others happy I have my selfish thoughts.. to rule, to achieve what I want.
It's ok to be sad White, because it's just a upswing for things to come. There is no explanation for the demands made on us by whoever and whatever, and as all true virgos you hate that too, you have always been a happy person, and been who you were, no qualms about that. I always liked that about you.
ReplyDeleteHere's a list of things I like about you to make you feel better.
You are very calm and very focused
You are yourself, never trying to fit in anyone else's shoes
You are a comitted daughter
A great singer who somehow didnt sing out loud so often, you are a great dancer ( trust me I know ), and a fabulous writer
You have so much potential, always had, and always will.
And I am sure you are a great mom and wife. Though I dont think these things matter as long as you bring happiness to the ppl you love, to be great at home front is a personal challenge, and one does as one seems fit.
And lastly, look at all that you have achieved, be proud and remember you broke the shackles with every little achievement in your goody bag. Respect girl. Respect yourself.
And whoever is making you feel sad, look on, tomorrow will be better, because you are better and bigger than that. Miles to go before you sleep and miles to do before you reap.
Hugs, and lots of happy thoughts.
Thanks! It immediately put a smile on my face. Yes, am getting back to my groove.
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